Round 3

Highlights

Aslan vs. Kirby -- and the winner is... Zaphod??
Aslan edged out Kirby 10-9 in what everyone thought would be a close battle for the division title. Earlier today, it looked like Zaphod had no chance to enter the tournament, until a machine tally of votes overturned the earlier judge's decision to award the first round match to Aslan. Kirby's subsequent loss to Aslan and Zaphod's victory over Francis created a three-way tie in the Division of Justice, meaning the chosen one would be determined by points. Zaphod, with 40, squeaked by with an insanely narrow margin over Kirby's 39 and Aslan's 38.

Second Straight Shutout for Obi-Wan
"Who am I? What is my Purpose?" asked Mewtwo as Obi-Wan entered the Viridian City Gym. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Jedi Master, sensed a disturbance in the force and really didn't give Mewtwo a chance to do much of anything, much less contemplate his raison d'être before he used his mad Force skillz to send him kicking and screaming into next week.

No Love for the Webcomics
The webcomic delegation to the festival -- Tycho, Francis, and Lupiko -- failed to bring home a single victory. The three of them have, apparently, headed back to Tycho's apartment to have a Black & White LAN party instead. When asked to comment, Tycho said, "I don't know what went wrong. Most of these punks I could usually beat any day with my wang tied behind my back." Lupiko told reporters, "You know, fighting to the death just really isn't my thing. I think I was just too nice a person for this whole tournament thing."

Unicode Consortium Decides on Proposed New Characters
Based on recent events, the Unicode Consortium has agreed to include Hylian Script in the Unicode Standard 3.2, while rejecting the Cowboy Letters proposal, and also the proposed Olympic Rings to be placed in the Miscellaneous Symbols block. No further reccomendations shall be made.

Techno-Classical Synthesis 14, Impressionism 4
In one of the most artistically inclined battles of the festival, Vanessa-Mae's energetic violin melodies overpowered the emotional brushstrokes of Claude Monet. The early moments of the battle treated onlookers to a blast of color and sound, but showed no clear victor, but before long the violinist said, "I wrote Contradanza," which stunned the painter momentarily and allowed Vanessa-Mae to splash his paint all over the place and wreck everything.

Full Results

Ballots cast: 14

Bach def. Toad, 21-3
Fett def. Zeratul, 9-7
Rinoa def. Knuckles, 13-7
Jackie def. Jason Fox, 23-2
Samus def. B. Marion, 21-3
Keyser Soze def. Home, 15-5
Aslan def. Kirby, 10-9
Zaphod def. Francis, 22-1
Link 3 def. Tom Mix, 21-4
Unicode def. D. Jansen, 17-3
Spyro def. M. Jones, 9-6
Li Mu Bai def. Marvin the Martian, 19-4
Bob Dole def. Lupiko, 19-2
Vanessa-Mae def. Monet, 14-4
Lancelot def. Tycho, 20-2
Tummi def. Aeris, 12-7

Link 4 def. Garfield, 19-1
Frodo def. Xar, 18-2
Link 1 def. V. M. Smith, 16-3
Obi-Wan def. Mewtwo, 24-0
John Murdoch def. General Tso, 13-8
Megaman def. Chun Li, 15-5
William Wallace def. Lynx, 21-3
Tyler def. Q*Bert, 22-3
Trent Reznor def. Brak, 12-9
Indy def. H-Dogg, 19-3
Weird Al def. Bartok, 16-5
Marvin the Android def. Psylocke, 10-9
Link 6 def. Lola, 12-9
El Mariachi def. Worf, 18-7
FDR def. Dirk Gently, 11-7
Alma def. Jeff K, 13-7

Characters © 1500-2001 by various people other than me. Used without permission.

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